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I never know what to put here.

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29th August 2006 | 08:21 pm
music: Ciara: Get Up [Main EQd]

I have this really big preoccupation that I no longer have anything of value to contribute in a conversation. It's like I talk just to talk but I really don't have anything to say.

I want what I have to say to mean something, to matter. And it's not just when I talk.

I'm stuck in this rut of non-productivity and the killer thing is that if I can't even help myself, I can't help anyone else.

And honestly, the only thing I really want is to be of service to someone, anyone.

Which is a roundabout way of saying that I want to matter. I want to be someone. I don't know what it is but I guess I'm not really feeling that right now. I just feel worthless and useless.

Who are you, Christine?
Right now? No one.

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Comments {2}

Sputnik Sweetheart

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from: selphish
date: 30th August 2006 03:48 am (UTC)

I understand completely, because I feel that way right now. I feel like I'm struggling to make someone love me. I just want someone to care.

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from: bambezzled
date: 1st September 2006 08:45 pm (UTC)

yeah, thanks. =] I hope everything works out well for you <3

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